Alright so update: Monday was successful. I had 634/671 calories. I weighed myself on Tuesday and was 134.5 calories. Yesterday was also good, 667/671 calories. I weighed myself this morning and I now weigh 134 lbs.
So, today is 471 calories and I'm feeling pretty damn confident. Down two pounds in two days and I'm going to keep pushing. I'll admit, yesterday was harder than Monday, Probably because I ate most of my calories at breakfast, so I didn't really have much room for error during the rest of the day.
I haven't worked out in like three days, so I feel like a slug, maybe I'll do some cardio today. So, yeah, that is all I guess.
Things are looking bright. Sorry for the inconsistent posting by the way. Updating from my phone is becoming extremely difficult.
Wish me luck!
~Cleosparks
Wednesday 22 August 2012
Monday 20 August 2012
Three... Days
Three days. Three. Days. I didn't even know it was physically possible to binge for that long nonstop with no breaks. Well, I did it. I look freaking pregnant. So backed up, it's not even funny. Seriously, imagine a binge bloat and then multiply it by three... It literally looks like my stomach is a seperate being from the rest of me.
I gained two pounds. 136. Why do I even do this to myself? I know how much I'll hate myself, but I still go and binge anyway. Fucking stupid. The last thing I wanted to do this morning was weigh myself, I just wanted to start this altered ABC diet and hopefully not be this bloated tomorrow. But then I remembered it was Piggy's Challenge weigh-in day so... I hopped on the scale. Instantly regretted it.
But to make myselfnot feel suicidal feel better, I focussed all my thoughts on the ABC today. I can fix this. I just have to have under 671 calories today. I can fix this...
Well, I've got nothing left to say other than I literally feel sick when I look in the mirror.. but what else is new?
~ Cleosparks
*edit* Oh, I also grew half an inch. 5'8" (Mental Happy Dance.) Maybe I still have a change at being in the olympics!
I gained two pounds. 136. Why do I even do this to myself? I know how much I'll hate myself, but I still go and binge anyway. Fucking stupid. The last thing I wanted to do this morning was weigh myself, I just wanted to start this altered ABC diet and hopefully not be this bloated tomorrow. But then I remembered it was Piggy's Challenge weigh-in day so... I hopped on the scale. Instantly regretted it.
But to make myself
Well, I've got nothing left to say other than I literally feel sick when I look in the mirror.. but what else is new?
~ Cleosparks
*edit* Oh, I also grew half an inch. 5'8" (Mental Happy Dance.) Maybe I still have a change at being in the olympics!
Friday 17 August 2012
Plateau
I hit a plateau (as the title so obviously implies). Well, technically, I've only been 134 for two days, but being one weight for more than one day for me, is considered a plateau.
You know how I get when something goes wrong, I panick and research it and figure out ways to fix it. And that's what I did.
On a site I found (can't remember which one), it suggested varying intakes. For example, I tend to try for 500 calories or lower each day. That adds up to a total of 3500 calories in one week. So the theory is, I should change up my intake daily in a way that when you add up all the intakes over seven days and divide by seven, it will still average out to five hundred.
So, I want to put that to the test... Using the ABC diet as a base. Here's what I did:
I started off by adding all the calories for the first seven days of the ABC diet together and dividing that number by seven. This gave me an average daily intake for those seven days. Then, I subtracted that average from 500 (the average I want). The number it gave me is the difference between my average (500) and the average for week 1 of ABC. Next, I added taht number seperately to all of the first seven days of ABC. Now I have the intake I need every day for seven days at an average of 500 daily while still varying my intake the same way the ABC diet does.
I basically just repeated the process for the second week and third week etc. Does that explanation make sense? No? Haha, don't worry I did all the math so no one else has to. ;)
Here's my personalized ABC diet after making the changes:
1. 671
2. 671
3. 471
4. 571
5. 271
6. 371
7.471
8.614
9. 714
10. 214
11. 364
12. 414
13. 614
14. 564
15. 600
16. 550
17. 350
18. 550
19. 450
20. 350
21. 650
22. 600
23. 550
24. 500
25. 450
26. 400
27. 450
28. 550
29. 378
30. 478
31. 978
32. 178
33. 428
34. 528
35. 628
36. 178
37. 678
38. 628
39. 578
40. 528
41. 478
42. 428
43. 415
44. 415
45. 465
46. 415
47. 515
48. 415
49. 365
50. FAST
So, basically all I did was alter the ABC diet so that the average daily intake is 500 calories instead.
Don't believe me? Take the first seven intakes of the original ABC diet, add 171 to each intake. Then add all seven of the new intakes together and divide that number by 7. It should equal about 500 (give or take one or two calories).
Yep, so I'm starting that on Monday. Until then I'll try and will myself into not plateauing anymore... Fun.
Wish me luck :)
~ Cleosparks
You know how I get when something goes wrong, I panick and research it and figure out ways to fix it. And that's what I did.
On a site I found (can't remember which one), it suggested varying intakes. For example, I tend to try for 500 calories or lower each day. That adds up to a total of 3500 calories in one week. So the theory is, I should change up my intake daily in a way that when you add up all the intakes over seven days and divide by seven, it will still average out to five hundred.
So, I want to put that to the test... Using the ABC diet as a base. Here's what I did:
I started off by adding all the calories for the first seven days of the ABC diet together and dividing that number by seven. This gave me an average daily intake for those seven days. Then, I subtracted that average from 500 (the average I want). The number it gave me is the difference between my average (500) and the average for week 1 of ABC. Next, I added taht number seperately to all of the first seven days of ABC. Now I have the intake I need every day for seven days at an average of 500 daily while still varying my intake the same way the ABC diet does.
I basically just repeated the process for the second week and third week etc. Does that explanation make sense? No? Haha, don't worry I did all the math so no one else has to. ;)
Here's my personalized ABC diet after making the changes:
1. 671
2. 671
3. 471
4. 571
5. 271
6. 371
7.471
8.614
9. 714
10. 214
11. 364
12. 414
13. 614
14. 564
15. 600
16. 550
17. 350
18. 550
19. 450
20. 350
21. 650
22. 600
23. 550
24. 500
25. 450
26. 400
27. 450
28. 550
29. 378
30. 478
31. 978
32. 178
33. 428
34. 528
35. 628
36. 178
37. 678
38. 628
39. 578
40. 528
41. 478
42. 428
43. 415
44. 415
45. 465
46. 415
47. 515
48. 415
49. 365
50. FAST
So, basically all I did was alter the ABC diet so that the average daily intake is 500 calories instead.
Don't believe me? Take the first seven intakes of the original ABC diet, add 171 to each intake. Then add all seven of the new intakes together and divide that number by 7. It should equal about 500 (give or take one or two calories).
Yep, so I'm starting that on Monday. Until then I'll try and will myself into not plateauing anymore... Fun.
Wish me luck :)
~ Cleosparks
Thursday 16 August 2012
Wednesday 15 August 2012
Binging Tip!
Okay, so after yesterday, I got really scared about the binge, so I looked up what to do after words and found this. In the comment section, I found this comment:
"I also find this method really helpful when ABOUT to binge. If you wanna skip the little intro go ahead to the ****
So you know that moment before the binge? There's always that moment where you THINK about the food, and what it would be like to have it, then there's another moment where you decide to give in, and you become very excited at the idea of delving into all that food - excited, almost anxious.
(Telling you guys... WRITE YOUR FEELINGS DOWN! those are the feelings I feel when about to binge).
And then I sort of devour the food, and look for the next available source... and eat and eat and slowly the pleasure starts to wear away after you've tasted all that food. You start to think, now that I've had FOOD A and FOOD B... and c and d... what ever, what's the next step? You already feel guilty for indulging. So you repeat - and eat more A and B and C.. at least thats what I do. Until I'm so full I feel sick!
****
So here's something I find really helpful when I feel about to just give in and eat everything in sight. First off, I do a bit of acting here and there, so believing and imagining is part of my every day life. This really helps me when it comes to my little enemy... the binge. So... I sit down and ENVISION myself eating all that food. Really try to imagine it, the first few bites, then this, then that, then eating more. The smooth texture of food melting in your mouth. The cheesy garlic bread, the crispy potato chips, the sweet, creamy (or doughy) ice cream, the cakey brownie, the soft frosting, the chewy or crunchy cookies melting....
Its awesome, right?? You're eating (without excess calories) IN YOUR MIND! But wait that's not it. Sure, its awesome. By this time, you've had the bread, the cookie, the crisps, the fries, the ice cream, the cake, what ever... Now what? I mean you just blew your diet. You JUST ATE 2000+ CALORIES in one sitting! GUILT settles in. Solution? EAT MORE. Before, you may have just been bored or hungry but now, its turned into emotional binge eating. See how it cycles? So you become angry - sad - you keep eating until you are sick - your all bloated and you feel your temperature up, your heart pulsing faster and faster as it tries to metabolise the colossal amount of calories you just ate (carbs, fats, whatever). You know your going to be crying over this for days, and working your little butt off in the gym for the next week. Now STOP.
Come back to reality. You're sitting on the couch, ready to grab that donut or bread and scarf the damn thing down. But stop, because you have just, succesfully, ENVISIONED a binge - not JUST the tastes of food, but the EMOTIONS. The positives and negatives. Now..... Look at yourself. PRE binge. After all that in your mind... aren't you glad you didn't do it in real life? You sure you still wanna binge and feel those negative emotions for the next..oh... week or so?"
Um... What the hell!? This is amazing! I'm just going to read this every time I want to binge or give up. Put the basic principle of the exercise into everything I do. Fucking genius.
Anyway, this morning I weighed myself. 133 lbs. Half a pound lost :) I'm just happy I didn't gain. No more binging for me. Not for a while.
Also, since I lost weight, I saw no reason to do the liquid fast as that's a way to lose more weight faster after a pretty powerful binge.
Since I'm a crazy nut, I researched basically everything that has to do with binging and how to lessen the effects and how to prevent it... etc. And I learned a lot about water retention and how it affects you. The fact that I haven't been drinking very much water is to blame for passing out and cutting my elbow, the fact that I have yet to drop a duke (four days and counting people -_-), my stomach looks all bloated and gross all the time, and my slowing pace in weightloss.
Moral of the story: drink water. And lots of it.
Today's goal is (surprise, surprise) under 500 calories.
Wish me luck
~ Cleosparks
"I also find this method really helpful when ABOUT to binge. If you wanna skip the little intro go ahead to the ****
So you know that moment before the binge? There's always that moment where you THINK about the food, and what it would be like to have it, then there's another moment where you decide to give in, and you become very excited at the idea of delving into all that food - excited, almost anxious.
(Telling you guys... WRITE YOUR FEELINGS DOWN! those are the feelings I feel when about to binge).
And then I sort of devour the food, and look for the next available source... and eat and eat and slowly the pleasure starts to wear away after you've tasted all that food. You start to think, now that I've had FOOD A and FOOD B... and c and d... what ever, what's the next step? You already feel guilty for indulging. So you repeat - and eat more A and B and C.. at least thats what I do. Until I'm so full I feel sick!
****
So here's something I find really helpful when I feel about to just give in and eat everything in sight. First off, I do a bit of acting here and there, so believing and imagining is part of my every day life. This really helps me when it comes to my little enemy... the binge. So... I sit down and ENVISION myself eating all that food. Really try to imagine it, the first few bites, then this, then that, then eating more. The smooth texture of food melting in your mouth. The cheesy garlic bread, the crispy potato chips, the sweet, creamy (or doughy) ice cream, the cakey brownie, the soft frosting, the chewy or crunchy cookies melting....
Its awesome, right?? You're eating (without excess calories) IN YOUR MIND! But wait that's not it. Sure, its awesome. By this time, you've had the bread, the cookie, the crisps, the fries, the ice cream, the cake, what ever... Now what? I mean you just blew your diet. You JUST ATE 2000+ CALORIES in one sitting! GUILT settles in. Solution? EAT MORE. Before, you may have just been bored or hungry but now, its turned into emotional binge eating. See how it cycles? So you become angry - sad - you keep eating until you are sick - your all bloated and you feel your temperature up, your heart pulsing faster and faster as it tries to metabolise the colossal amount of calories you just ate (carbs, fats, whatever). You know your going to be crying over this for days, and working your little butt off in the gym for the next week. Now STOP.
Come back to reality. You're sitting on the couch, ready to grab that donut or bread and scarf the damn thing down. But stop, because you have just, succesfully, ENVISIONED a binge - not JUST the tastes of food, but the EMOTIONS. The positives and negatives. Now..... Look at yourself. PRE binge. After all that in your mind... aren't you glad you didn't do it in real life? You sure you still wanna binge and feel those negative emotions for the next..oh... week or so?"
Um... What the hell!? This is amazing! I'm just going to read this every time I want to binge or give up. Put the basic principle of the exercise into everything I do. Fucking genius.
Anyway, this morning I weighed myself. 133 lbs. Half a pound lost :) I'm just happy I didn't gain. No more binging for me. Not for a while.
Also, since I lost weight, I saw no reason to do the liquid fast as that's a way to lose more weight faster after a pretty powerful binge.
Since I'm a crazy nut, I researched basically everything that has to do with binging and how to lessen the effects and how to prevent it... etc. And I learned a lot about water retention and how it affects you. The fact that I haven't been drinking very much water is to blame for passing out and cutting my elbow, the fact that I have yet to drop a duke (four days and counting people -_-), my stomach looks all bloated and gross all the time, and my slowing pace in weightloss.
Moral of the story: drink water. And lots of it.
Today's goal is (surprise, surprise) under 500 calories.
Wish me luck
~ Cleosparks
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